3 Stupidest Things I've Ever Heard

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Dear Brain Trainers:

We are taught using metaphors, parables and "sayings." We call them sayings because someone once said them. That is not an assurance of their quality. It is just a statement of the obvious. To make things worse (or more worser yet still), the older they are, the more wisdom is to be assumed to be contained in them. And to further worsen things (to make the worst even more worser yet), the more that people say them, the truer they are. This is interesting, because apparently, there are degrees of truth -- I'll have to consult neighbor Bill Clinton regarding the particulars of this issue.

Here, for you pleasure, live (somewhat) from The Braintenance Blog Of Blockbusting Brilliance, we offer you the three stupidest things I've ever heard, excluding such conversational Moronyms as "Notary Republic," Redundons [trite, expressions spoken by members of the Order of Illiterati such as "I'll be here for the duration," and the like:

1) "If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times." [mathematically ridiculous];

2) "If you had half a brain, you'd be dangerous!" [This could mean many things, none of which would make me dangerous, unless I had stolen an ossified hemisphere from the exhibit in the science lab and flung the thing at someone -- which would actually cause 'brain trauma' in both senses of the expression!];

3) "Hey. We all put our pants on the same way. One leg at a time." [This is intended to make the person being spoken to feel more self confident. It is stupid. What if I'm going to read an academic paper to a bunch of Celts? What if I'm wearing my little black party dress? And what about the time when I was an undergrad, and I won a five dollar bet by putting baby oil on my legs and jumping into my jeans from the upper bunk in my dorm room?]

Enough. Now sit back, relax and enjoy a gentle bit of philosophy, with Flickspire's wonderful video, titled, "Life Is Like Coffee": Simply click on the link below:

= LINK BELOW

Even if you disagree with the philosophy, or the simile (the cousin of a metaphor, but using "like" or "as" in its description and delivery), the acoustic guitar music is wonderful. Seriously, the music is so relaxing, and the sound quality crystal clear. Someday, when I find myself (how 'bout that one? Eh?), I would like to try my hand (there's another - is it metonymy or synecdoche? {sp?}) at producing a philosophical video. I'd give it a snappy title like "Crossing The Callosum"

Thank you, as always, for reading me, digging me, grokking me, and feeling me - and for sharing my articles (my wallet is missing! So's my pen!) with your contacts, comrades and colleagues across your social media platforms.

Douglas E. Castle

Sponsored By: 
CFI - CrowdFunding Incubator LLC 
ICS - International Connection Services 
Global Edge Technologies Group LLC 
CFI Business Growth
Douglas E. Castle On LinkedIn - Join Me! 

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Stretch Your Mind: Because Bigger IS Better...

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The objective of this article is to cause you to use several different parts of your brain's faculties from both hemispheres. The exercise is truly (and legally!) mind-expanding. I was always Leery of Timothy -- But was Timothy Leary of me?

A

Solutions To Our Last Post, Where I'll Give You Answers Without Explanations - PERCEPTION EXERCISES:


1) Which of the two figures is more stable, standing on its widest surface (on either end -- you choose)?  The Cone. It might have something to do with the width of the base versus the "width" (merely a point) at the top.

2) How many cones could you fit (with the dimensions in Figure B) or could you insert into a cylinder (using the same dimensions as in Figure B)? Only one. Despite the fact that a cone contains only one-third of the volume of a cylinder, the size of the base is the limiting factor. Bet you thought the answer was two... well then, don't ever bag my groceries at the supermarket.

3) If you roll a cylinder across a table top, what type of shape would it create? A large circle, the radius of which would be equal to the height of the cone. Close your eyes and you'll see it more clearly (this is not an oxymoron)
4) If you push a cylinder (by its wide side) on a table top, what kind of a shape would it create? It would create a long rectangle, until it finally rolled off the table top. We call this the "Toilet Paper Effect" (No. We actually don't. But It's hard to know if that statement is true because I am a pathological liar)

5) If you could glue a limitless number of same-sized cones together at their respective tips, what type of geometric solid would this fusion resemble from the outside? A sphere, with the complexion of a golf ball.

6) If you knocked both a cone and a cylinder over, which of the two shapes is more likely to stay closer to you (instead of rolling under the couch where the dog might accidentally eat it?)? The cone. Just try to imagine a puppy rolling a cone across the room; not picture the same puppy with a soup can or a toilet paper tube.

7) Assume that the widest end (or at least one end) of  each of the shapes were open, which could you stack that would require less space? The cone. Just take a walk over to the office water cooler and look at it. Go on. Cone-shaped cups are stackable. Even truncated cone-shaped cups are stackable. Cylinders have to be stored side by side -- although that can be done in a number of ways, one of which would create a shape which, if looked at head-on, would be shaped like a pyramid... or like....a cone!

8) If both shapes were filled with Styrofoam (or even vermiculite... choose any filling that you wish, as if you were at Aunt B's Yogurt And Cupcake shop) which one would float on its side, and which one would bob? The cone would bob, and the cylinder would merrily spin on its side.

9) Why do you think that cones are used for automobile steering system precision testing, while cylinders are selected to be filled with sand to buttress certain highways (near toll booths and such) in the event of a car crashing into them? Because although the base size is still the same and the cone might actually be more stable, you can fill the cylinder with three times as much buffering material to absorb the impact of the car driven by the imbecile who was texting. Just an example. The Braintenance Blog does not preach. It couldn't anyway -- it does not have the power to speak -- it is inanimate.

10) Bonus! You get to reduce three dimensions to two! Position both shapes to be standing upright, and side-by-side. Cut each in half with a laser beam (or a sword, if you'd like). Without touching the bottoms, throw the tops away. Looking at each of the halved shapes at eye-level, which one will look like a rectangle, and which will look like a trapezoid? Saw a cylinder, get a rectangle if seen from the front; saw a cone, get a trapezoid if seen from the front.

NOTE: In actuality, if you looked at each in the full three dimensions, the cylinder would still be a cylinder (just shorter and stumpier), but the cone would have become a frustum.

B

Now, relax your body and your mind, and focus on the sound of this wonderful babbling brook, embedded and sweetened with very gentle binaural pulses and positive subliminal suggestions. CLICK ME

C

Find the next entry in each of the following sequences:

• 2, 4, 8, 16, 32, ? 
•  
• 0, 1, 1, 2, 3, 5, ?
•  
• A, C, E, B, D, F, C, E, G, D, F ?

D

Without looking up, how many "bullets" were lined up vertically in the preceding section?

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Thank you for visiting, I'll be seeing you very soon. Not literally, of course.

Douglas E. Castle for The Braintenance Blog and sponsored by

CFI CrowdFunding Incubator LLC

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• Perception Exercises: Arouse Creativity - Expand Imagination (braintenance.blogspot.com)
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• Zebrafish stem cells could heal human retinas (thehindu.com)
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